Sunday, May 12, 2013

Be My Guest

Hi, I’m “Reality Barbie,” “ I’m Not Kim Possible’s mother.  She asked me to do a guest blog and I thought Mother’s Day was a perfect day to do it. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, you can follow my blog at  I don’t post as often as KP and I’m nowhere near as funny.  Follow me anyway.
Kim writes about me A LOT.  She writes about my cooking skills, my mad “Mom Skills,” my compassionate side, etc…  Now, it is my turn to write about her.  Yay!
Kim was a pleasure to raise, mostly.  Her teenage years were challenging though.  Not she’s a drinking, smoking, snorting, hoe kind of challenge.  She ain’t about all that y’all.  It was mostly because she had a mouth on her and she didn’t mind using it.   Add to that an Einstein IQ and there ya go, a challenge.   Then, give her some freedom in the form of a semester of out-of-state college, and challenging turns into pert near unbearable.
We made it through all of that though, and she has turned into quite the young woman.  In fact, she is a strong, God loving woman that makes her dad and I very proud.  She is a wonderful mom to our two grandbaby girls, an attentive wife to our son-in-law and a smart cookie.  She has mad cooking skills she got from me and a “don’t tread on me” attitude she got from her dad…haha!  Kim has a funny side that often borders on hilarity.  She has kept us in stitches since she was little.
When she was about 3 years old, she had just gotten out of the bath, dried off and took off running, naked, for her room.  She didn’t notice the door was shut.  She bounced off of the door sohard, she landed in the bedroom across the hall.  This story always cracks me up.  That night, I was laughing so hard that all I could do was sit down on the floor and hold her while she cried.  Bless her heart.  She laughs about it now too.   That was funny y’all.
Then there was the time she flew through the air…yes, flew…all the way across our great-room.  I was cooking and Kim and her dad were playing with one of those huge bean bag things you sit in the floor on (the name of it escapes me…well, I am a granny after all).  He would fluff it up, sit Kim on the edge of it and plop down on it, throwing her a few feet across the floor.  They were both laughing like crazy and having such a good time.  Dad got very brave, fluffed the bean bag thing up as big as he could get it, sat Kim a little further up on it and all heck broke loose.  He plopped down with his whole body on the bag and…yep, she flew across the room.  I’m talking 6-8 feet off the ground.  She landed about 10 feet from where she started.  She was delighted, Dad was cracking up and the next morning, the bean bag thingie was in the trash.  Guess I showed them who is boss.
When she was about 15, we took her, her sister and her friend from next door trick-or-treating.   Kim dressed in overalls, a flannel shirt and a dirty face.  Instead of saying “trick-or-treat” when the doors opened, she said “you got’ny cock- roaches in there?  I’m hungry and I won’t me some cock-roaches.”  We hid so no one knew she was with us.  But, we laughed the whole time.
Other awesome things you may not know about Kim:
She has a collection of blue ribbons and trophies from riding horses.  She competed in barrel racing, western show and hunt seat (English) show.
She won the Florida State Championship for CMSA (Cowboy Mounted Shooting) several years ago, I think it was around 2009.
She can and will get on the back of a horse most people wouldn’t even attempt.  She has no fear.  She also has a way with horses, a strange, calming connection with them.  It is a beautiful thing to watch.
Her IQ rivals Einstein’s.  In 5th grade, her teacher tested her IQ because he couldn’t keep her interested in class.  He began teaching her Egyptian math just to give her something to do.  The “No Child Left Behind” program wasn’t for her.
She started reading when she was 4.  She read a book to her Grandmother Butch who was so shocked she almost cried.
Her blog is written with relaxed grammar, but she has the ability to write quite eloquently, following MLA rules to the T.
She gives birth like a rock star.  In fact, if you have ever given birth and had witnessed Kim do it, you would want to beat her for making it look so easy.  Even I wanted to beat her…then again, the babies are my grandchildren, so that redeemed her.
She is a great soccer player.  She hates to run though.  Go figure.  She ran on the cross country team for 2 years in high school.  I don’t even know what to tell you about that.  Bless her heart!
She has been the part of and/or formed several clubs:  The Peanut Butter Gang was a group of the Barn Brats who rode at the same stables she did.  She started a Cooking Club in high school that took possession of too many of my kitchen utensils.  I’m sure there are more, I just can’t recall them right now…kinda like the name of that bean bag thing.
Kim is a cool kid.  I will say it again, she makes us proud.  Obviously, we love her very much.  What you have just read can’t possibly tell you how much this kid means to her Momma though.  There aren’t enough words in all the languages in the world, added together, to express that y’all.
That’s all I’ve got, for now.  I will think of some other things to tell you about here.  Check my blog.  I don’t know if she will let me guest blog again after this…

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