Sunday, December 23, 2012

Flower Petals

Apparently it's very important for a blogger to include a step-by-step tutorial at some point to help readers. Well, today's the day.

I'm going to teach you how to deal with a traffic signal. This seems to be very difficult for quite a few people in our area, so I'm assuming it's a nationwide, possibly even a global issue.  It's actually a three fold tutorial.

If the light is green:
Step 1: use the pedal (not petal, as many people commonly confuse the two words) on the right. This is called an 'accelerator".

Step 2: continue driving.

If the light is yellow:
Step 1: Make a decision. 
Step 2: stick with it.
DO NOT stutter with the brakes...someone WILL hit you.

If the light is red
Step 1: look for cops.
Step 2: No cops, you're good to go. If you see one, the brake pedal is on the left.

Alright folks. There you have it. Next time you're approaching a traffic signal and you forget what to do, reach into the passenger floorboard to find your smart phone, scream at your kids a little, and look up my blog post. Don't forget to glance at the road every 30 seconds or so. And if the cop pulls you over for driving on the median and running the light, just tell him, in the infamous words of Shaggy, "wasn't me".

1 comment:

  1. Two things:

    1. You are hilarious.

    2. This blog is now on my favorites list (or at least it will be once I can log onto the computer -cause I don't know how on my phone).

    Martha Jane


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